The Only Slightly Mediocre Pirates of The Caribbean: Jack Sparrow is Back At It Again

Ms. Halina Vercessi, Editor In Chief 

Image Courtesy of Wikimedia

Image Courtesy of Wikimedia


My initial reaction when I heard that a fifth Pirates of the Caribbean movie was coming out was “What? Seriously? Another one?” No matter how much a fifth movie seemed like a bit of an overkill and maybe just another way to rake in the big bucks from dedicated fans like myself, I was still excited to see Johnny Depp portray the iconic Captain Jack Sparrow and hear that kickass soundtrack again. Considering it is the fifth movie and that I heard it got bad reviews, I made sure to have low expectations as I entered the theatre. The film opened with a scene of a young boy and the quick flash of a piece of parchment saying “year seven” or “year nine”; it didn’t take much brain power: I knew immediately that this was the son of Will Turner and Elizabeth Swan. Just to jog your memory, the 3rd movie, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End, ended with Will Turner taking up the Captain’s position of the cursed ship, The Flying Dutchman. This meant that he and his crew could only return to land every ten years. And, I must say, it was quite a sight for sore eyes to see the ever-beloved character of Will Turner (played by Orlando Bloom) make an appearance after his absence from the fourth movie, Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, and his heart-breaking departure in the third movie. One driving part of the plot was introduced when Will’s son declared his determination to free his father from the curse.

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The Aftermath of an EF5 Sharknado


Mr. Thomas Daley 

One highlight of this coming summer (for some) is the highly anticipated release of the fifth installment in the Sharknado film

Image Courtesy of IMDb

Image Courtesy of IMDb

series. Subtitled “Earth-O”, Sharknado 5 is poised to be more ridiculous than Sharknado 4: The Fourth Awakens, whose Star Wars-inspired title is ridiculous enough in itself. Critics accuse Sharknado of being bad and a waste of resources, but is a bad movie necessarily a bad thing? And are the Sharknado movies actually “bad”?

A Dysfunctional Storm Surge

The Sharknado films have consisted of plotlines as weak as the science behind a “sharknado” in the first place. The fifth movie is set up to continue the trend. Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No! might have taken lead, Fin Shepard, and company to a space battle with some rogue sharks, while Sharknado 5 promises to take the world by storm.

Sharknado 2: The Second One started a tradition of including well-known personnel as actors. Al Roker along with the rest of Today gave an eloquent weather report of a Manhattan sharkstorm; Daymond John from Shark Tank also had a cameo that ended well for a “real” shark; and Sharknado 3 showcased Mark Cuban’s service as president. The fifth installment does not appear to be as star-heavy, but will include British diver and Olympic medalist Tom Daley.


Celebrities and all, a Sharknado film is far from conventional; however, unorthodox does not necessarily correlate with bad, especially in creative endeavors such as cinema.

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VT Birds: On the Decline and Cause for Concern

Ms. Carly Alpert, Special CVC Environmental Correspondent

Birds are like stars. They brighten up the sky and bring joy to those who view them. But unlike stars, many Vermont birds are in danger. There are eleven bird species in Vermont that are endangered, and two bird species that are threatened. There seem to be three major reasons for these alarming facts.

One leading cause of birds becoming endangered is habitat loss. Loss of habitat occurs for a variety of reasons. Climate change is one factor, being responsible for the rising temperatures in which some bird species cannot survive. Curt Alpeter, Chairman of the Vermont Audubon Society, as well as avid birder, provides a specific example in the Bicknell’s thrush. Alpeter says, “This is a bird that depends on cooler temps, higher mountain elevation, and the habitat that is found there to breed and nest. Climate change is impacting this habitat and the temperatures at 3,000+ feet of altitude and forces the birds out of their historical breeding areas. Since this is such a select area, the number of places that can support these birds is less and as a result their populations are dropping.”


Bicknell’s Thrush, photo from Cornell’s Lab of Ornithology “All About Birds”

Additionally, forest fragmentation destroys birds’ habitats. Urbanization in Vermont is causing large forests with diverse ecosystems to be divided into many smaller subsections. Smaller forests don’t have the resources that many species need to survive, forcing them towards extinction. It is essential that Vermonters preserve their birds’ habitats if they wish them to continue to flourish.

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The Apology Complex: Why It’s Time to Stop Saying “I’m Sorry”

Editor-in-Chief, Ms. Koko Vercessi


Courtesy of BBC

How many conversations have you had with your friends where you don’t say sorry at least once for something that didn’t require it? While many people believe that old school manners and the art of etiquette is dying, others are suffering from a very different kind of problem that doesn’t involve rudeness. All around the world, people are plagued by what has become known as the “Apology Complex”, or “Sorry Syndrome”.

“Sorry Syndrome” comes in the form of a type of constant verbal regurgitation of the words “I’m sorry” during situations that do not really call for this kind of proclamation of an apology. An apology can take the form of an admittance of guilt, a way of showing regret, or an attempt to show sympathy. The words once used to convey an apology are now being used in everyday conversations. I doubt that anyone has passed by or participated in a conversation in which they have not heard or uttered themselves the words “I’m sorry” when the situation did not really call for an apology.“Sorry Syndrome” has gotten so bad that people assume judgement and feel the need to apologize for simply just being, or just acting in a natural way. But because of a comment or funny look, many of us resort to simply apologizing to the people around us for being ourselves.

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Opinion: College Athletes Should Not Get Paid

Mr. Josh Bliss

Last year, freshman superstar Ben Simmons was benched in a basketball game for failing to earn a 2.0 GPA in the fall semester. He later dropped out of school after the season ended, and has yet to play a game in the NBA.

You may think that paying someone for a skill they excel in would be a good idea. However, if this were to be set in place, the consequences would greatly outweigh the benefits.

Image Courtesy of Wikimedia

Image Courtesy of Wikimedia


This would be significantly unfair to non-athletes. According to the National Collegiate Athletics Association (NCAA), only six percent of students at a Division I College participate in sports. When taking into account the small chance of even becoming a part of this six percent (only seven percent of high school baseball players will even play Division I, which is also true for three percent for men’s basketball, and seven percent for football), it is very unlikely that the average person will ever be a part of this selective group. This is why paying college athletes would be unfair to those that aren’t filled with elite athletic talent. The money would only go to a certain crowd of people, which would be unfair to those that are skilled at something else, but they wouldn’t be getting paid for it, such as musicians, artists, etc.

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Waiting for more of that SAINT LAURÉN Vibe: A Shamana SoundCloud Review

Mr. Keenan Reinsborough, CVC Music Critic

In the genre of lo-fi hip hop, you will struggle to find an artist more polarizing than Shamana. With lo-fi hip hop bubbling under the surface of mainstream for quite some time now, I would not be surprised if he was the first to cross over. Shamana’s sound is difficult to describe. At times it is moody and jazzy, at times it is distorted and booming. I really didn’t know what to expect going into his first full length album, considering his ongoing style changes and recent struggle with depression. What I wanted was a project that exemplified his sound in all facets, no matter how strange or left field, and I wanted some bangers.

For the most part, I got what I wanted.

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Opinion: Just Suck it Up and Go to Prom

Ms. Koko Vercessi, Dancer-in-Chief

So it’s that time of year again, the overly priced dresses, the last minute corsage order, the dinner date, and the awkward “who do I go with?” hangs in the air during prom season. You either see this historic event as an overly popularized and fantasized pointless tradition, or you are among those who are excited for a night of uncomfortable shoes, questionable music, and lavish clothes. If you would consider yourself a scrooge of the prom season, I would encourage you to finish this article and see if I can convince you otherwise of your argument that prom is a meaningless, overly hyped, expensive, antiquated tradition.

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Ducky and Andy going in style (80s style)

The Cambridge Dictionary defines prom as “a formal party held at the end of the school year for older students in high school.” That doesn’t sound so bad does it? Afterall, who doesn’t want to go to a party? Apparently more people than you would think, as over 63% of Americans think that prom is overrated. Before we start delving into why I think you should not miss out on this formal, guaranteed to be awkward, time old tradition, let’s get more closely acquainted with the history of prom shall we?

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Review: Beauty and the Beast, Surprisingly Not Bad

Ms. Halina Vercessi, Film Critic-in-Chief

There was a whirlwind of hype surrounding the new Beauty and the Beast movie months before its premiere. There was a flood of new Beauty and the Beast toys throughout the children’s section (one doll in particular even got attention on social media for possessing an uncanny resemblance to Justin Bieber). And, of course, the major Broadway and Disney fans made their own guesses and judgments as to how Emma Watson would suffice as the leading lady. I must say that I went into the theatre with very low expectations. I felt as though it would turn out like NBC’s live “Sound of Music”…altogether disappointing and underwhelming. Oh yes, I walked into that theatre as if I were Steven Spielberg or something; (*yawn) I’m expecting to be disappointed so let me just sit here and haughtily eat my Welch’s fruit snacks. I can definitely say that I was pleasantly surprised (I also finished off all of my Welch’s fruit snacks before the movie started, but that’s beside the point). The prologue had just barely began and I found myself in awe of the stunning visuals. The original prologue in the animated film illustrated a brief encounter between the arrogant prince and the enchantress in disguise. However, in this film, the prologue was expanded and perfectly set the scene of a flourishing, decadent and egotistical lifestyle for the spoiled prince. The costumes were artistic, gaudy and intricate, but fittingly reflected the era of the late 18th century.

Emma Watson as Belle made her appearance shortly after the prologue. My predisposed ideas were true; she sounded very British (you can imagine we all had some Hermione déjà vu there), which was a large difference from the original Belle, and her singing didn’t sound trained. Though these judgments remained true throughout the movie, I felt that they did not affect the quality of her performance. Emma Watson, as the actress, did not have to be like the original Belle for the performance to feel right. Though I am partial to the original, she took Belle and developed the character in her own way, while still maintaining the original traits and goals. In this film, the characters were given the opportunity to grow before our eyes. I must say it was absolutely impossible not to love the Beast as his character was also further developed and given more nuances and quirks. The interactions between Belle and the Beast were priceless; there were formalities, but then there were familiar and charming exchanges of humor. Their connection was also deepened with the added backstory of the fate of Belle’s mother and how the Beast had also lost his mother.   

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CVC Scallion: Left Twix Leader Assassinated by Extremist Right Twix Group

Mr. Keenan Reinsborough, CVC Staff Satirist

Shocking reports released this Monday show that president of the Left Twix Alliance, Seamus Twix, was shot while addressing the public. Political analysts are speculating the motives of the attack were caused by the repeated abuse of prisoners of war held captive by Left Twix.


Image from the Alt-AP Wire

When asked to comment, the vice-president of the Left Twixt Alliance (LTA) had some healing words for the nation: “In times of turmoil, we must remember that we are all human. We are not animals, for we cascade caramel on a cookie and choose proudly to bathe it in chocolate”.  

Charlie Beckham, a spokesperson for a political group that self-identifies as  an “Alt-right Twix”, was quoted as saying, “Though it is a tragedy that he is now gone, people need to remember that Seamus was a tyrant who cascaded caramel on his cookies. A man who engages in such filthy activities is not fit to lead a nation.”  

Tension has risen recently between the two sides as the public continues to argue at weather to bathe or cloak its cookies in chocolate. Bipartisan Twix continue to go unheard.     


The CVC Scallion is a little Onion-esque section of The Chronicle.  Please be advised: THIS IS SATIRE, and therefore is not to be taken (too) seeriously.  –CVC eds.

An Epic Trek: The Walk Down from the Junior Lot Involves Minor Suffering, Major Complaining

Ms. Olivia Cottrell

HINESBURG– On any given morning of the school year, you can see the 50 or so juniors, and few random lucky sophomores, making the long trek down from the junior lot. The walk isn’t too torturous. Unless it’s cold, rainy, windy, snowy, icy — or pretty much any other type of weather that isn’t sunny and dry. While the commute itself is not that long, less than ⅛ of a mile, it’s the conditions that make it seemingly tortuous.

For at least three months of the year, and  more often than not, closer to five and a half months, the walk seems to take forever. People stumble along, wrapped in layers upon layers of winter clothing. The whole way down the wind stings any uncovered skin and freezes your joints, as there is nothing in to stop it but the chain link fences, . The walk back up is rarely any better, except for the rare occasion when the weak rays of winter sun poke through and turn the snow into a blinding spectacle of blinding white.

Junior Lot 1

A hapless student scales the direct route to the Junior parking lot. Homework laded pack mules not pictured. Image by Isaac Cleveland

Though the path is plowed when there is snow, it is still slick if you are not wearing real boots, which many students don’t wear for the sake of style. The path from the junior lot winds down from Pond Road to the entrance to the faculity parking lot. It is made of white gravel that is loose in places, and will kindly stab your foot if you happen to find a loose piece and have on a soft soled shoe. The path is the safest, most reliable way down from the junior lot. But it is not the fastest, nor the most commonly traveled way down.

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Opinion: New Vistas Development Falls Short of Utopia

Ms. Carly Alpert, CVC Environmental Correspondent

If we continue emitting the amounts of greenhouse gasses that we do today, it is projected that by 2060, we will die from lethal heat stress, according to the American Geophysical Union. We clearly need to make a change in our lifestyles, preferably a drastic one, if we want to be able to continue calling planet earth home. Former Mormon bishop David Hall believes the problem of global warming can be combatted with his invention of a completely sustainable design called The New Vistas. However this design appears very cult like and does not seem like the appropriate method to address the world’s environmental issues.

In blue, properties bought by NewVista. In red, the Joseph Smith Memorial. All data is approximate. CREDIT NICOLE ANTAL / DAILY UV

In blue, properties bought by NewVista. In red, the Joseph Smith Memorial. All data is approximate. CREDIT NICOLE ANTAL / DAILY UV, by way of

David Hall plans to build The New Vistas in southern Vermont; more specifically in the intersection between the towns of Turnbridge, Royalton, Safford, and Sharon. It is a non-profit organization, committed to building an entirely self-sustainable community. According to the New Vistas website, the goal is to “provide housing and employment opportunity within an ecologically and economically sustainable infrastructure, and conserve real property for fully sustainable development.” People who want to join this community must sell off all their assets with the proceeds going to the Foundation. In exchange, that person can live in The New Vistas. Everyone who joins the community will be entirely equal. He plans on 20,000 residents in this first community, but he expects it to grow, and eventually be home to 1 million people in Vermont alone. His goal is to eventually create a continuous empire of 5,000 acres, made up of many communities.

People living here are limited to the opportunities granted within the small walls of their community. They are literally shut out from the real world; living in an alternate fantasy world. It sounds like a mix between Divergent and The Matrix. While this does seem like an enticing program because it supposedly will have little to no impact on the environment, it is very different from anything Vermont has seen before, which makes some people uncomfortable.

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Opinion: Trump Hit the Refresh Button on Democracy

Mr. Shane Beal, Guest Political Commentator

How Trump Rewrote the Political Script as the Founding Fathers Intended

First and foremost, when I say that Mr. Trump is healthy for the political system, I’m not making a defense of his character or any of his particular policies. The reason that he’s good for our electoral process is because he fragmented the strict two party system that has dominated American politics for decades. In this capacity, what he did could have been done by any outsider candidate, and the good he did has to be viewed in the appropriate context.

His victory is good in the sense that it prevented Hillary Clinton from winning. Had she won, both parties would have reinforced the notion that in order to win an election, their candidates would need to conform to traditional party values and platforms. Mr. Trump’s victory showed that a candidate who appeals to the concerns of the citizenry, regardless of where these issues fall on party lines, can win an election, and in doing so, encouraged both parties to diversify their views, reorienting their agendas from reinforcing party platforms regardless of current issues to paying attention to and addressing the individual and fluctuating concerns of the American citizenry. In this context, Mr. Trump’s election is a resounding success for our political system and, more importantly, for the American people. Mr. Trump’s victory now is a victory for every candidate who appeals directly to the citizens rather than to the party, and will allow the citizens of our country to better be represented by their candidates.

John Trumbull's "Declaration of Independence" (1819) has hung in the White House Rotunda for nearly 200 years.

John Trumbull’s “Declaration of Independence” (1819) has hung in the Capitol Rotunda in Washington DC for nearly 200 years.

The oppressive two party system that existed prior to Mr. Trump’s election was an evil that the founding fathers predicted and understandably abhorred. As John Adams said, “there is nothing which I dread so much as a division of the republic into two great parties, each arranged under its leader, and concerting measures in opposition to each other. This, in my humble apprehension, is to be dreaded as the greatest political evil under our Constitution.”

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Gorman is fired up on sno’chines

Mr. Kyle Gorman

A small community connected far outweighs a large community divided. Small areas in southern Vermont have become a primary example of that point. In these more rural towns there are far fewer restaurants and stores and way more woods. The people in these less modernized communities have used snowmobiling as a unique way to get out and socialize, indirectly creating a small, harmonious society.

In the cold of the stagnant Vermont winters, Springfield, Vermont is arguably the most happening spot in the northeast. The peace and quiet of the woods turns into a racetrack filled with the brap sounds of powerful snowmachine engines. These unique snow vehicles have become a staple of these small communities and have created a more harmonious stomping ground in an area that may be lacking in similar rallying points.    


I was lucky enough to gain access to the inner circles of the tight-knit snowmobiling pack down in Springfield.  Upon first entry I met over fifty people who were regulars to the group. Each of them seemed ecstatic just to be sitting on the snowmachines. I asked Mr. John Prescott about his experience with the group and how it has affected his life. Mr. Prescott told me that there was well over 200 “riders” that would join in on the weekly excursions. Prescott then went on to talk about how he and his wife rely on the outings as their social circles. Mr. Prescott said, “It is a fantastic way for someone of my age, really of any age, to get out into their community and meet people, while also having the time of their life”.  He mentioned that he was very thankful for the group of people he rides with and that he was astonished by what good, life-time friends he had made just by ripping around the woods with them. Mr. Prescott relayed all of this information to me with an enormous smile on his rosy face, a similar expression that I observed on all of his friends winter-whipped faces.

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Opinion: “snowblades are the greatest ski medium known to man”

Mr. Douglas Schmidt

Two words: Snow. Blades. What are they, you ask? Well, quite simply put, they’re the greatest skiing medium know to mankind. Snowblades, also known as Skiboards or Snolarblades, are by definition “a winter sport which combines elements of skating, snowboarding, and skiing.” Now this definition is correct, but there’s much more to blades than just that.

Snow blades are not just skis. They’re twigs, strapped somewhat flimsily to your ski boots, with one simple purpose; to put ordinary skiers to shame. Snow blades average around 75-99cm in length: just about two feet. It’s like skiing on the soles of your boots, just at very high speeds going down a mountain.


(Not) Doug Schmidt getting rad on ‘blades.

You have an extreme amount of control on these little twigs of fury compared to your average 170 cm ski.  The reactiveness of your blades to your movement is almost instantaneous, whereas, for full-length skis, it takes a lot more power and strength just to make a turn.  Snowblades are also perfect for the woods. Because of their size, blades make it easy to navigate around tight trees and to stop on a dime if you run into trouble.

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Dawn of the zombies: sleep-deprived teens need to get off the screens

Mr. Nathaniel Mick

The recommended number of hours a teenager should sleep, according to the National Sleep Foundation, is seven to nine; in reality, only fifteen percent of teens are getting that amount. Between blue light from screens, distractions from devices, homework, procrastination, and early school starts — teenagers have a lot to deal with. It’s no surprise that so little get sleep, but that’s no excuse for more than eighty percent of teenagers to lack sleep so often.

There’s a certain beauty to the irony that I am falling asleep at my keyboard as I write this.

The problem with sleep is that it is easy to go without it for a night, but that could mean up to a week of recovery. Many teenagers, and adults, haven’t felt what being truly rested feels like in a long time. With so much going on in life, it’s easy to put off sleeping for later. After all, sleeping takes up valuable working time, and seems so trivial. However, recovering a night of sleeplessness isn’t as simple as it seems. Sure, missing a few hours the night before a big test can be reversed with a few more hours of sleep the days after. Unfortunately, when you miss a few hours for a week or two, things start to get complicated.

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Opinion: skeptical politicos, it’s time to get real on climate change

Mr. Alex Merrill

Every year it seems that winter is getting a little shorter.  Climate change is a reality that we must understand. Snowfall is becoming noticeably unpredictable. What used to be a thick white blanket that coated the landscape has turned into a variable carpet frequently interspersed with rain and long thaws. While many of us hate prolonged periods of -10°, few of us complain about lots of snow. Shorter winters are the most notable effect of climate change, and others persist.  The drought that we experienced over the summer can also been attributed to climate change.

On a larger scale 100 year storms are occurring more frequently. Is the old 100 year storm now a twenty year storm?  What will the new 100 year storms look like?  Will we see more flooding? More droughts, and more heat waves?  From a statistical lens it appears so. Fifteen of the sixteen hottest years on record (through 2015) have occurred since 2000 according to NOAA (National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration).  This does not include 2016 which may well be the hottest year on record according to Saying that this is a coincidence is statistically impossible.

Image courtesy of Skeptical Science

Image courtesy of Skeptical Science

In the last several years, landmark deals on climate change have been reached, culminating in the Paris accords which stipulated that all countries seek to limit global warming.  This summer, a deal was reached to limit the emissions of fluorinated hydrocarbons, HFCs that are 100 more times powerful than other more common greenhouse gasses such as CO2. These international deals represent significant hope for the planet.

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Opinion: All men (and women) are (not) created equal(ly)

Mr. Bryan Claussen

The belief that all men are created equal is a concept that our country was founded under, for the text is engraved in the Declaration of Independence. As the document says, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable Rights…” Jefferson claims that is is “self-evident” that all men are created equal, but is that really true?

All men might be more or less equal in the eyes of the law, but in the real world, from the moment people are born, nobody is equal. From the genetics side of it, people are naturally born different. Some people are born sick or disabled. Some people are fast, others are slow. Some people are tall, others are short. The diversity in humankind cannot be overlooked, is what makes our species so strong and interesting. Every human is born physically and intellectually different than everybody else, which means that nobody is equal.

Image courtesy of

Image courtesy of

On the other hand, we are not equal because of the situation we are born into. The social class, physical location, and race that someone is born with can greatly affect opportunities that that person receives. The Economic Policy Institute analyzed statistics on young children’s reading and math abilities coming into Kindergarten, and found that “Children in the highest socioeconomic group have reading and math scores that are significantly higher—by a full standard deviation—than scores of their peers in the lowest socioeconomic group.” This means that children in lower social classes have a disadvantage in school from the very first day.

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The footbag feud: fun or fitness?

Mr. George Lomas

Racing back from the Stone Age, Footbagging has made a drastic come-back among youth, and even adults. Footbagging is a sport and fun backyard activity that anybody can play. It requires no more than a simple round bag filled with sand or dirt and your feet. Many people who are completely uneducated and inexperienced in this activity are very easy to spot because of their use of the words, “Hacky Sack”. In this case, “Hacky Sack” is a direct meaning for, “I don’t know anything and am very stupid.” By using the word Footbag instead, you immediately give off the vibe of superior intelligence and skills. The rules to Footbagging are simple; you can use any part of your body other than your hands and arms to keep the bag in the air. Usually, people use their feet by kicking the bag straight up into the air at roughly eye level, over and over again and passing it to other players. It may not sound like much, but the second you make a successful kick, you’ll be hooked for life.

Courtesy of Pintrest

Many people believe footbagging to be a high-intensity requiring a lot of flexibility and strength, but not according to footbagging amateur Kaelan Murdock: “I find footbagging to be quite peaceful and calming. In fact, I can never footbag without doing some sort of meditation or mindful breathing techniques at the same time. It helps me focus on my foot-eye coordination and balance. I’m surprised that no one has come out declaring footbagging as a form of meditation.” According to Soren Kurth, a footbag specialist who shares a similar opinion to Murdock, “Whenever I footbag, I play music in the background, usually sounds of nature and chimes. It keeps you in the correct mindset which is having a calm and sturdy soul and empty mind. This makes it a lot easier to make your kicks and stalls much more natural and effortless. It’s almost a form of yoga in that you’re keeping an empty mind, but being be aware of your body and surroundings along with keeping a steady breathing pattern.” Very interesting perspective from Kurth and Murdock.

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Ravell on cereal: Lucky charms, neither charming nor lucky

Mr. Ravell, Food Criti  at Large

Lucky Charms are a classic cereal that are among the most popular. But should they be? To me, Lucky Charms are only half good, at best. Half of the cereal is tasteless and leaves a weird residue in your mouth, the other half is marshmallow that is more styrofoam than anything else. Every bowl of this cereal has left me feeling unsatisfied and sad. Lucky Charms are bad tasting, not very healthy, and, not even very lucky.

In my research, I have found that I am not alone in this feeling. CVU senior, and breakfast cereal enthusiast, Walker Storey, says that the marshmallows are “way too sweet” and that the other pieces are “too hard to wrangle.” Storey also describes them as “the grossest things of all time”. CVU senior Colin Monsey also agrees that the marshmallows are too sweet. On the other hand, CVU senior Natalie Gagnon says she would like the cereal if it was only the marshmallows, and it would be called “Lucky Marshmallows”. While people have different reasons, they agree that Lucky Charms are an overrated cereal.

Image via Deviantart, by RegularBrony54

Image via Deviantart, by RegularBrony54


People who disagree with me may say that the cereal has to balance healthy and unhealthy to be both good, and good for you. While the gross brown things may taste healthy, they aren’t as good for you as you’d think. Every cup of this cereal has 2.6 grams of fiber, which is only 0.1 grams more than Cinnamon Toast Crunch, a much better cereal.

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He’s a little bit country: Gorman defends the genre

Mr. Kyle Gorman

Music can define a generation, set a mood, and make anyone feel a wide variety of emotions. There are infinite genres under the musical umbrella. With that said, there is no style more versatile than the storied genre of country music.  

The 40s had swing jazz, the 80s had rock and roll, and the 90s had grunge. All of those types of music were fun, but fleeting. There is no longer popular jazz, or rock and roll on the radio, they have become lost arts of music. Americans have ever-changing musical taste, with that said, Country music has always managed to maintain real estate in the hearts of the people.

Image courtesy of "This Day in Country Music"

Image courtesy of “This Day in Country Music”


Country music has been around for decades, the twang of the guitar and the intricate lyrics have been a staple in the music industry for quite some time. Although the first official country song was released in 1922, Sallie Gooden performed by fiddler A.C. (Eck) Robertson in 1922 for Victor Records. Since that release date country has remained a favorite of the people. The earliest form of a top charts was released in 1950. From 1950 to the present, there has been at least 6 country tunes within the top 100 songs for that year. No other genre can say that. Country music will never get old, the priceless harmonies and clever lyrics have kept the country engaged for almost a century now, with no signs of slowing down. Even through the decades bombarded with rock and roll, rap, pop, or disco, country music has sustained a powerful position as the most consistent genre.

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Opinion: Everyone needs to calm down and accept Trump as POTUS

Mr. Willem Hillier

It’s official. No matter how you feel about it, Donald Trump is going to be president of the United States, and there’s nothing we can do about it. This could prove to be the most significant election in U.S. history in a very long time. He has promised to do things that no other candidate has ever even mentioned, many of which are questionable in their legality, morality, and are more often than not, straight-up ignorant. He has insulted every minority out there, repeatedly called global warming a hoax, convinced a large percentage of the general public that Barack Obama wasn’t born in the US, and has been accused of sexually assaulting multiple women.

President Trump, Courtesy of Wikimedia

And yet, with all of these potential negatives and the general scandal surrounding him, he is going to become the 45th president. This election has driven a deep divide in the country between the liberal-leaning and the conservative-leaning. Right now, our number one priority should be healing that divide, and Donald Trump needs to work on this himself — choosing Steve Bannon, the CEO of Breitbart News, as the chief advisor was a terrible move for unity due to his affiliations with the alt-right movement. Breitbart news has published pieces with headlines such as “Would You Rather Your Child had Feminism or Cancer” and “There’s No Hiring Bias Against Women, They Just Suck At Interviews”. Either of these headlines should disqualify him from being chief advisor immediately.

While Donald Trump may not be making the best choices himself, this doesn’t mean we should do the same. The country needs to come together despite our differences, and yelling “F**k Trump!” repeatedly isn’t going to accomplish this task. Instead, let’s all move forward together.

Sweatpants slide comfortably into the fashion spotlight

Mr. Kyle Gorman, Fashion Critic At Large

Fashion is one of the most exclusive industries in the world, and there are definite sacrifices that must be made by the fashion forward. Only the most elite fashion icons know of the illusive style triangle. The greats say that you can only pick 2 of the three; comfort, style and practicality. Only one solution to this three sided problem lies in stretchy elastic and cotton. Sweatpants are the ultimate style option.


David Huber launches his modeling career with “Grey Steel”

In the past, humans have dressed themselves in numerous fabrics to show rank, or for protection etc. Nowadays, fashion has become an extension of your inner being, and anyone who is a master of the fashion world wears sweatpants. These incredible pants are the most comfy, stylish and practical option on the market. The fashion triangle has seemingly met its match. Regardless of what companies’ sweatpants you wear, the non-constrictive fit makes them comfy in even the most uncomfortable situations. Not only are these two legged invention from the heavens comfy but they are also a perfect bottom option for any occasion. Whether you want to go for a jog, or see a movie, or go out to eat, look no further as sweatpants present the most versatile pant option the world has ever seen. The appeal doesn’t stop there; along with the comfort and practicality, sweatpants have busted onto the scene as the most fashion forward pant. Numerous stars, like the all famous Justin Bieber, and Kim kardashian have repped the new trend on multiple occasions. As sweatpants continue their rise through the fashion industry their popularity soars and everyday the fashion triangle sheds a tear as sweatpants defy the rules of the world.


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Sofa in Learning Center: both Comfortable and Constructive

Ms. Emma Lieberman

Authors Note: The entirety of this piece was written while sitting on the big comfy couch in the learning center, while a CVU Junior (who wishes to remain anonymous) was power napping in the corner.

Come on in and take a load off. Recently, the faculty lounge sofa was placed in the CVU Learning Center. It is rumored to return to its home after school on Friday, Dec. 9, but I believe it should be a permanent addition to the school’s common areas. Rahn Flemming, Learning Center Tutor, says that it “promotes tenacity and academic endeavors because when you want to get up and leave, you can’t”.

After speaking with several CVU students, it is understood that the couch in the Learning Center is not only comfortable, but it is alse aesthetically pleasing. Caleb Jensen, strong safety on the JV football team says, “It’s a pretty couch.” In addition, it has social value, as you can fit anywhere from one to six students on it, and the couch is non-discriminatory. The couch can accommodate students of all shapes and sizes. Roarke Flad even states, “I got more work done in one block on that sofa than in any other chair in the school.”

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Opinion: Is glorifying violence justifiable in film? That depends…

Mr. Daniel Sedic

Image Courtesy of CNN

Image Courtesy of CNN

For as long as film and cinema have been popular, there has been controversy surrounding what should and shouldn’t be shown on camera. As society has changed, so have the standards of the medium. For example, in 1932, a film by the name of Freaks aired; a movie about a circus sideshow that was run by people with myriads of deformities. Viewers at the time were so shocked by the abnormalities that they left theaters. One woman even claimed to have had a miscarriage as a result of such intense shock.

That screening was more than 80 years ago now, so it begs the question how would those same viewers react to such films as Friday the 13th, or Scream? Cinema has evolved to such a degree that we’ve developed our own sub-genre of horror movies dedicated solely to plots in which an antagonist racks up an impossible body count. Not only this, but cinema has the ever popular Action movie genre – macho tough guys spend their 90 minutes shooting big guns and killing lots of bad guys. So how is it that we’ve come so far in terms of our tolerance for touchy subjects in cinema? And is our insensitivity a bad thing?

There’s a popular debate that movies with controversial subjects are more likely to succeed since they appeal to the more perverse side of human nature. For example, Django Unchained : A movie about a black slave in the 1800’s turned bounty hunter, with a mission to free his slave wife. Over 250 slurs are used, and quite a few of them are racial slurs. People bleed out, limbs get blown off, and some poor old man in a bathtub actually gets his phallus shot right off by Jamie Foxx. That scene always has everyone grimacing, yet everyone finds it so entertaining. Quentin Tarantino, the director of the film was asked in an interview about his excessive use of violence in his films, and why he used violence so prominently as a plot device, to which he replied “Because violence is so much fun!”.

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The chasm between Liberals and Conservatives widens

Ms. Ella Beauchaine

Image Courtesy of New Mexico In Depth

Image Courtesy of New Mexico In Depth

The lack of commonality in the political field has caused an increased divide between not only the two political parties in America,but between the American people altogether.  Knowing what is fact and what is real, has become almost irrelevant to many media news outlets, which has, in turn, caused the partisan polarization in the news to devise itself as the norm.   The way that American citizens are obtaining their news, differentiates in such a dramatically different way that it has caused an information gap and selective perception.

Not only is there an information gap between young and old citizens, there is an information gap between liberals and conservatives.  The gap between the information obtained in the American two-Party system causes all of the citizens to be more different politically than ever before.

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Is Climate Change Causing Vermont Winters to Disappear?

By Ms. Mia O’Farrell

Photo Courtesy of Inhabitat

Photo Courtesy of Inhabitat

We know the climate of our world is changing, and here in the small state of Vermont we can already identify some if it’s impacts: seasons changing at unusual times compared to past years, and temperatures rising at alarming rates being just a few examples. With these changes, Vermont as whole will be impacted, however; the greatest impact of all will be on winter, a season important to Vermonters and tourists alike, and one that is crucial for Vermont’s economy and recreational opportunities.

With temperatures becoming warmer year round, winters are getting shorter, and snowfall is becoming even more unpredictable. Here in the U.S., temperatures ranging from December through February have increased 0.55 degrees Fahrenheit on average per decade since 1970 -but this isn’t the case for the Green Mountain State. Here in Vermont, temperatures are found to be warming quicker than the national average, with winters warming twice as fast in relation to summers, and seasons changing at different times compared to previous years. In fact, fall is now beginning later than usual, resulting in a shorter winter season due to the fact that spring is now appearing earlier in the year. These concepts, coupled with increasing temperatures, make for a troubling forecast in the future when our winter precipitation shifts from snow to rain.

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